Finally got my copy of the April issue of ANIMANIAC!, only two weeks late
this time.  For those who still have not yet received their copies, here are
some of the more interesting news tidbits found within...

CONVENTION WAR HEATS UP -- 
        Just when it seems that the war between the summer conventions was 
cooling off, horrible new salvos have been fired off from both sides.  "MT is
the son of the devil!" said a spokesperson for AA, foam flying from his lips.
"He drinks the blood of newborn infants!  Serpents spring from his shadow!
Death and destruction shall be your lot if you follow him!  He also has a
small penis."  In response, the staff of AX drove past AA headquarters and
mooned them.
        All this was in response to reports that engineering students on the
AX staff had succeeded in building an android replica of Johji Manabe that
was exactly like the real man, except even more hentai.  They allegedly
planned to substitute the android for the real one during AA's masquerade,
causing utter chaos when scantily clad female fans walked up on stage.
        "This accusation is ridiculous," said MT, in a carefully worded reply
on a popular bulletin board service.  "We do have such a replica, but he 
will be auctioned off at the AX charity auction, after he signs autographs
and does sketches.  The paranoia of AA knows no bounds."
        Nonetheless, AA is allegedly building its own secret weapon.
Unconfirmed reports are that AA has acquired AX's android plans and used
them to create 20 replicas of Carl Macek, which will be unleashed upon the
terrified AX crowd, arguing for dubbing, buying the rights to popular anime,
and generally being a royal pain in the ass.
        Mutual destruction seems assured if the conventions continue along
this path.  Fortunately, at least one of the twenty-six conventions
expected to be born from the disaster is bound to succeed.

NEW SUBTITLING COMPANY TO ENTER AMERICAN ANIME MARKET --
        AnimEigo, USRenditions, US Manga Corps, ADVision, Streamline, and
Joe's Anny-May Funhouse are soon to have major competition in the form of
a new company that will be licensing Cream Lemon, Pink Noise, and 
1+2=Paradise, as well as Sony's abandoned Minna Agechau sub.  "Basically, our
premise is that sex sells," says Antonio Ferengi, president of T&Anime.
"Better animation, mature plotlines, and believable characters may go over
well on the computer nets, but when it comes to makin' dough, nothing
succeeds like independently jiggling animated boobies!"
        Other companies appear nonplussed by the new arrival.  "Hell, we've
known that for years!" said a spokesperson for US Manga Corps, proudly
holding up a copy of PROJECT A-KO and pointing to the "CONTAINS NUDITY"
message on the front cover.
        Robert Woodhead of AnimEigo expressed disgust when asked for comment.
"We cater to a much higher class of anime fan, with much more sophisticated
tastes.  The last thing our customers want from us is meaningless sex."  When
pressed, however, Mr. Woodhead admitted the company is "seriously
considering" replacing the cover of URUSEI YATSURA TV #1 with a shot of Lum
topless from the first episode.

SEQUEL FEVER CONTINUES FOR GUNDAM FANS --
        Very few series sell as well as Mobile Suit Gundam, and Bandai knows
this, which is why seventeen new television, OVA, manga, and movies are
planned for the coming year alone.  Unfortunately, the tight Gundam
continuity is proving to be a problem, as there are fewer and fewer places
to squeeze in new series.  For example, in GUNDAM 0083 1/4 : AFTERNOON
DELIGHT, a 12-episode OVA series planned for the fall, a young hero takes
control of a new experimental Gundam and puts down a Jion uprising, all in
the space of a single Saturday afternoon.
        But by far the most interesting of the Gundam sequels is GUNDAM
0081 7/8 : BRINGING DOWN THE HOUSE, a live performance in Tokyo's theater
district, which climaxes in a dazzling battle between two full-size, fully-
armed mobile suits.  Despite the $150 ticket price, 25,000 fans a night line
up to sign the medical waiver and attend.  "It sure beats the karaoke bars,"
said one happy audience member.  "Uh oh, here comes an American television
crew.  I forget, am I supposed to be obsessed with America or disgusted by it
this week?"

There were a few other interesting articles.  Maybe somebody else will post
them when they get their copy.

(Of course this is an April Fool's joke, you weenie...  :-) )

                        ---------- Ryan Mathews